Tuesday, June 23, 2009

with your feet out, girl you lookin' good

My toes are not “normal.”

I’m one of those people who have toes that freak some people out – my second toe is longer than my big toe. Now mind you, I don’t have a complex about this. I pretty much don’t care. But some people seem to. My friend Dom commented on this phenomenon a few weeks ago, when after seeing my cutely-sandaled feet, he mentioned that he has a longer 2nd toe as well. Although, apparently his “abnormality” (I hate that word) goes a bit further – all three of his middle toes are the same length, all taller than the big one. Maybe his pinky toe as well, but I really don’t remember. We commiserated a bit about how our “specialness” causes some people to recoil in seeming horror with but a glance at our poor little piggies. (What? You don’t have random 10-minute toe conversations at social gatherings?!)

I’d pretty much forgotten about that conversation until this afternoon in the ladies’ restroom closest to my cube-home (read: cell). First of all, I have to say: Ladies (I assume this goes for gentlemen, too, although I’m less experienced in that area), if you walk into a public restroom and there are several stalls open, never take the empty stall right next to another occupied stall unless absolutely necessary. It’s called common courtesy. But anyway – I was sitting there, taking care of minding my business, when someone entered the stall next to mine. Mind you, our restrooms are pretty bland, everything the same yellowish color, quite boring and utilitarian. As I guess public restrooms should be. So, you know, eyes tend to wander, and I happened to glance at the feet of the person next to me. And her poor little toes. The first four of which were all the same pudgy length. I couldn’t even see the pinky toe, since it was (I hope!) hidden under her sandal.

What went through my mind in this moment?
Eww. That’s weird.

I’m a toe supremacist.

(When I have absolutely no right to be.)
(isn’t that the way it always is?!)

1 comment:

Andrea said...

I've heard that when your second toe is longer you'll be the dominant one in your marriage. But that was some of that "country wisdom" I picked up when I lived in the sticks next to the moonshiners, so there may not be much truth to it. I also learned that when it rains while sun is shining it means the devil is beating his wife.